All I Want for Gay Christmas

Like any good lesbian there are days where I think: “What are they up to?” and by they I’m totally not referring to one of my actual friends. No, I’m talking about the most important people to have ever entered my lesbian life. The ladies of The L Word.

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I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU.
Seriously. Why did you end? I know I’m not the only one who thinks everyone on that show is actually a friend of yours, an ex of yours, a hate of yours, a skank ass ho that stole your ex girlfriend and continues to suck out your soul? You know:

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Jenny. Fucking. Schecter.

Seriously though why do all good shows have to come to an end? It’s not like us lesbians have anything that’s all ours on t.v. The L Word could have seriously had MASH staying power. Every new generation of lesbians would just get a new cast. You know like Degrassi? Which for the record IS STILL ON. I WANT THE L WORD BACK I’m stamping my feet and whining.

So I know it’s not going to happen. I do have six seasons to watch and watch and watch as many times as my soul can take. And I can get all re-mad at some of the absolute bull shit that went down. Like:

That time they killed Dana.

That time SHANE LEFT CARMEN AT THE ALTER.

When Max went gay and than got pregnant AND THEN GOT LEFT. Like seriously could we possibly have made Max’s life any fucking harder? First Jenny, than that cunt who broke his heart because he used to be a she, than the whole I’m with a gay asshole deal, and then the whole having to deal with being a pregnant man ALONE deal? Jesus Illene. Fucking. Jesus.

That time Carmen and Jenny peed together…I can’t.

THAT TIME PAPI AND KIT DRY HUMPED.

When Alice started hooking up with Lara?!?

The 80 million times Bette and Tina broke up. The 80 million times I wanted to vomit seeing Tina naked.

When this woman LEFT:

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God Shane. First Carmen. Than Paige. You fucked up my two biggest L Word crushes. AND THAN AND THAN there was that time you started fucking FUCKING Jenny. Da. Fuck?!?

That time the most perfect couple ever Alice and Tasha got all fucked up because Tasha started having feelings for what’s her fucking third wheel. And I legit cried at how upset Alice got. Fucking lesbians.

That time the entire 6th season happened.
…yeah that time.

It’s gonna rain all weekend. Soooo you wanna come over and watch? Each episode is about an hour 13 episodes a season soooo we can get through 3 seasons allowing for food, potty, and sex breaks. Because lez be honest who has made it through an entire episode with a person their interested in without not totally jumping their bones? Try not to. I dare you.

Also can someone get this girl a cheeseburger?

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