So I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again. I’M SICK AND TIRED OF ALL THESE MOTHER FUCKING LESBIANS ON THIS MOTHER FUCKING PLANE. No but really. I don’t know if it’s the weather, all the pollen in the air, your intense hangover from Dinah…but seriously. Y’all have gone cray. I can’t deal.
Heres the problem with lesbians. Well a bunch of problems rolled into one summary. Ok so girls will be girls. Girls will befriend girls. This is normal girl rule. Basic girl rule. Now what happens when said “girls” are into dating other GIRLS. Dun dun dun. Fucking hell breaks loose. Because then we all get stuck in this weird vortex. Some of us stay friends and than within that group of friends random people start dating yet continue hanging out as friends. And tha said friends who have begun dating break up and stay hanging out with group of friends. And thus all hell breaks loose. Its fun. Really. A fucking total joy.
How do we fix this?
We need to stop the recycle cycle. If you choose to date someone in your group of friends you must come to terms with the fact that chances are more than likely the two of you will break up. So once the two of you break up, you’re both still going to hang out with the same group of people BECAUSE YOURE PART OF THE SAME GROUP OF FUCKING FRIENDS. Get it? Comprehend? You know who suffers in this? US. The friends. WE SUFFER. I have been the product of one divorce already. I don’t need to go through one every time a couple that I’m friends with breaks up. Fo realz. We are adults. (no matter how many games of flip cup I play) Being an adult means that you deal with things in an adult manner. Meaning when you and yours break up you do it in a manner in which you both understand what is going to happen next. LAY DOWN THE FUCKING RULES. Talk it out. It is your own damn fault for dating someone that all of your friends are friends with to. Now you gots ta deal. Yes it may suck. But you have an entire cast of friends that you can now date. Because god forbid you date one of the other thousand lesbians in this city. You wanna keep it close. You deal with the awkward proximity issue. Because you know who doesn’t want to hear about it? THIS KID.