Falling Into Fire.

I’m not scared of much
Except that I’m terrified of everything
When I was young
I would hold my hand over my heart and count out each breath as I fell asleep
Sometimes late at night when I am up to my usual restlessness I find my hand creep
It lays itself on my heart and in my manic head
I try not to panic

I feel more myself in the Fall
Crunch on leaves that I can feel up to my aching knees
Joints angry at the weather
The urge for fire is ever present
For a lit cigarette
A bonfire
Smoke that will linger
That will fly up into black skies into leaves the color of fire
Fall breathes fire

Her mouth never opens much more than slightly
But her arms and her eyes
They are so alive
Dancing while talking
Dancing like the fire that burns itself into all of my thoughts
She is
She is fire and she sways and prances
She captivates and romances
Words
Her words they come out with the pressure of a fire hose
A contradiction in the most alluring fashion
Her body is fire
Her words pressure
Fire
Pressure
And in this moment my brain is soothed
My panic that manic that mania that engulfs me

It’s silent

Stretch my arms out
And spin
Like a top that doesn’t know it can stop
Like the hands of clock
Like a skydiver falling down to earth
And pretending that the hard ground beneath them is nothing more than a myth
Fall instead into bed
Feel the warmth of her embers
She is charcoal after the cookout
Warm and softly crackling

Old antique stores sell keys by the dozen
Keys that have lost their owners and locks long ago
Keys that kept secrets
Keys that opened the doors to childhood homes
Keys that locked sheds that held the tools to grow gardens
Keys that lovers slipped to each other
Starting new life with one another
I am the key that got left behind
And you are the lock that has rusted with time

Let me be yours
Let’s make up for lost time
Fall

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One thought on “Falling Into Fire.

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