The Tale of Two Browns

So I’ve taken a little blog hiatus. Forgive me. I’m back like Whitney’s new boost in sales. Wait. Too soon? It’s been a weird few weeks. Celebrities are doing what they do best; dying, the entertainment industry is doing what it does best you know, forgetting… (uhmhaichrisbrownisafuckinfdouchebagwhodeservesnothingmorethanapenispoundingbyafewthousandgirlsinstilettosnotafuckinggrammy). I’ve been walking around in hoodies and holding on to my sinus’s for dear life because well the world is ending and winter forget that it was its turn on the season wheel of fortune. So what to do what to do what to do. Ah watch the best of the internet. I givith you media Tuesday:

Now about that weather, this has become my new favorite site at telling me what the fuck it’s like outside (scary) without all of that weatherman bull shit. Seriously do you even need any form of schooling to get that gig? :

Now if the weather isn’t making you crazy apparently dick will. I did not know this being a lesbian and all but really, apparently dick will make you do some cray cray shit. Like what you ask? Like this:


Because most of my readers are lesbians, and that last snippet just did not apply to our lives let me make it up to you real quick.

You are very welcome.

So we all know that SNL is essentially never funny anymore. Seriously it has been YEARS since I got excited to watch an episode. Instead I just head to Hulu every Sunday and watch the top clips. (you know you do the same thing) But something strange happened this weekend. What? SNL was ha-fucking-larious. Also side bar -what the flying fuck was Bill O’Reilly doing on an SNL sound stage? The world really is ending.

Now speaking of the world not being right I brushed over two things before that are both pretty fucking serious, and coincidentally share a common link. Two men with the last name of Brown. Whitney Houston’s death sadly shows us how even the highest can slowly fall and crash land into a place where we never could have imagined. Say what you want but I do think the person who played not only an immense but pivotal role in her demise was Bobby Brown. Anyone who watched their reality show a few years back basically watched what happens when people have way too much money and no one wrangling them in. No one holding them back from making not only fame reducing mistakes but permanent life scars. Fast forward a few years to a new couple. Young, talented, and good looking we were bombarded with images of Chris Brown and Rhianna. And than one night those images became a nightmare. We all had a front seat viewing session as pictures of a freshly beaten up Rhianna surfaced. The Rhianna. Beat up by The Chris Brown. The backlash in Chris’s face was immediate. Radio stations vowed to ban his music. Fans and celebrities alike voiced their hate for Mr. Brown. But like all things in Hollywood the incident was quickly forgotten.

We are an ADD culture after all. Even something as disgusting as abuse can be swept under the rug with a few new club beats. This years Grammys brought Chris Brown back into the spotlight AND gave the douche bag a Grammy. Seriously. Really? That alone was too much for me to handle but than… Oh and what’s this? Rhianna just dropped a remix featuring him? I’m sorry WHAT? This isn’t real. The sane part of my brain doesn’t even know where to begin. I essentially want to personalize apologize to anyone who has ever been subject to abuse. Apologize for the fact that someone who could have turned her horrible experience coupled with her extreme star power into a force to help. Instead she is sending a terribly mixed message to her fans. She is also showing young women exactly who they should not strive to be. I do feel that there is power in both apologies and forgiveness. But this is a situation where forgetting just isn’t an option. Anyone who has the capability to beat someone up once has the ability to do it again. As someone who was brought up as a Quaker, there is no part of me that has any compassion towards those who chose their fists over their words. If Rhianna was your sister would you blast Chris Brown in the car? Would you easily forget what he did because of his celebrity? I don’t think so. Two women permanently affected by the men they chose to love. We can hope that Rhianna will never fall to drugs the way Whitney did but seriously if she can rekindle a relationship with someone who beat the shit out of her how far away is doing a few lines with him? We live in a world where news is old news the minute it happens. But some things need not be forgotten.

We all need to separate the ridiculous of celebrity thinking with how we lead our own lives. Too often do we see celebrities as invincible role models who can do no wrong. This simply is not the case.